I have always loved Christmas. I'm sure that's largely because of how I was brought up. My mom started listening to Christmas Carols once Labor Day hit (although I think she sometimes listened to them secretly before then). When we got older and moved on to college, we would go to California to visit my uncle for Christmas. Christmas was big and traditional for him. Traditionally Norwegian immigrant, I mean. Christmas memories for me are of singing, fireplaces, leffse (or is it lefse?), Grandma and Grandpa, going to Christmas Eve service, laughing, drinking, dressing up, enjoying time with family. In my adult life, I have tried to continue my love of Christmas. Unfortunately, I married a man who is a killjoy for most everything I love - especially Christmas. Fortunately, though, he left last Christmas Day to go and live with his girlfriend. I would never have imagined 6 months ago, 9 months ago, 11 months ago, that I would have ever used the word "fortunately" in that sentence. However, that is the way I feel today. I am not writing to bash my almost ex-husband. He's a good man, if confused, and truly messed up. He has his own demons that he has to wrestle with, and although I have something to say about those, this is not the place for me to do so. I am writing because I am reclaiming, well, read the title, you'll figure it out. You're smart that way, right?

I can't remember every detail of every Christmas, not even every detail of every Christmas of my marriage, but I can remember the tone of most Christmas's in my marriage - that was stress. When it was time to put up the decorations, the PIA factor of the lights and getting the ornaments up - I just simply didn't enjoy it. Plus, my music preference and my almost ex's music preference did not mesh. Then there was his ever increasing need to stop in the middle of what we were doing and go and get something, buy something. Then there was my (I'll admit) possibly annoying need to clean each nook and cranny prior to putting anything up. It just, well, it never went smooth. I have not enjoyed decorating for Christmas in years.

Then he had some odd ban against Christmas music before Thanksgiving. Here, I thought it was the music of autumn. You know, "Fa la la la la" as the leaves turn colors . . . "Glor-or-or-or-ia" as you are raking leaves off the lawn. Well, I suppose that is sort of the case in Virginia after Thanksgiving, but still, for me, "Rum pum pum pum" as you are getting on the school bus. I didn't get it. He thought I was weird, I thought he was an oddball. Best to keep these opposing views out of the same home. That really should have been a warning sign, you know?

This year has been different. I have been unabashedly listening to my Christmas Carols definitely before Halloween. I don't remember if I got them out at the end of September or the beginning of October. I think it was October, but I will fix that next year. No one has berated me, or talked down to me because of it. Well, Elisabeth's (the little 2 year old that I watch during the week) mother did remark that she thought it was odd that Elisabeth was singing what sounded like a Christmas Carol. Luckily, her mom is a good friend of mine, and she KNOWS that I listen to Christmas music early - so there was no need to explain! I have loved having my Christmas music on. No guilt. Just for me - well, and the girls, who I will now warp, I mean teach to realize that Christmas is the music of fall too!

Then, yesterday, we got out the Christmas decorations. A little early, even for me. I really just wanted to have the Advent wreath out, because we are going away for Thanksgiving and the first Sunday in Advent is the Sunday after Thanksgiving. Well, once we started getting them out, we had to look at them, and discuss them, and decide where we would put them. Suddenly, I found myself cleaning the furniture that will now be cloaked in Christmas knick knacks and table runners and fake snow for almost 2 months (can't take the decorations down until Epiphany, you know! What would those Maji think if there were no decorations for the Baby Jesus?). Then up go the decorations. Now, we haven't finished the decorating by a long shot. There is still more to go. I have the Advent Wreath out - but somehow lost the pink candle and I think 2 of the 3 blue ones need replacing - but I have a week to do so! (Plus, I should probably research some decent Advent Devotions to go with the candle lighting!). At first I thought I would just do a couple of things, BUT NOT THE TREE!! OH NO! I AM NOT TACKLING THE TREE TODAY!!! (huh, that really would have gone better had I used the "caps lock" oh well!). But, soon I found myself rearranging the dining room, wiping the base boards that will be covered for almost 2 months, and cleaning the window so that we could put up the tree. Then almost every light was burnt out on the tree. (AAAAUUUURRGH! - Charlie Brown style!). However, it was not a big pain. We listening to Christmas music. Now, in fairness, Emma was at a birthday party, so it was just Sarah and I. Sarah was so interested in everything going on. She sat right there next to me, helping me check to see if any of the bulbs had black on them. She threw away the burned out bulbs, as I put the new ones in. We went through an entire 100 light strand, replacing light bulbs. There are still some burned out on the tree, but there are enough lit that it looks pretty, so when Emma came home from her birthday party, we decorated. It was so much fun - you know, once Emma got past telling Sarah that all the ornaments were hers (what is she, 2?). We played Christmas music, and decorated, and enjoyed each other's company.

Tomorrow, we are going to tackle the outside lights. I've already enlisted my trusty adult help to hold the ladder. (While there are a lot of things I feel quite comfortable doing with just the girls and I, I DO NOT trust either a 7 year old or a 3 year old to hold the ladder for me as I climb up to the roof to put up Christmas lights!). I'm also going to try to get some more decoration done inside. You know, cleaning while I go - oh, AND listening to my Christmas Music!