Last week, Kevin and I took Jess over to the Lynnhaven mall for the SAHM's group (that's Stay At Home Moms, for the acronymically challenged) and met up with a few other moms. (Kevin, of course, was the only dad)

Anyway, Lynnhaven mall has a really nice toddler play-area. The floor is padded thick before the carpet was laid out and there are lots of foam sculptures for the kids to run and jump and play on - slides and tunnels and critters, all done out in a sea theme.

Anyway, last night, having been couped up in the house with a somewhat bored and cranky baby, I suggested we go over to the mall, have some fast-food and let Jess run around in the play-area for a while. (Note to self: Might want to decide this just a little bit earlier next time, as we didn't get home until almost 9:15, which is about an hour past Jess's bed time)

Jess was a big hit with all the two to three year old girls. And one sixteen month old boy. They sort of clustered around her and tried to get her to toddle towards them or hold her hand or pat her hair. It was very cute, although I had to pretty much stand on top of them, because every once in a while, one would try and pick her up, and while that's cute, I don't think a 25 pound pre-school girl has the necessary strength to pick up a 20 pound toddler and not drop her immediately on her head.

At one point, one little girl discovered if she beat on one of the painted columns that ran through the middle of the room, that it was hollow and made a rattling boom sound. The other kids thought this was absolutely fascinating and gathered around to repeat the experiment. After a few minutes, there was a fairly steady, although syncopated, rhythmic chant going along with it. Jess decided this was some groovy dancing music and stood near the beaters, twisting her hips along with the beat.

After Jess had worn herself down some, we headed over to the food court to grab something to eat - McDonald's for Jess and Philly Steak for us. I waited for the McD's. There were four employees there - one cashier, one front girl, one cook and a manager.

The cook I only saw for a minute, a teenaged boy with his hair shaved along the bottom of his scalp and the rest of his hair caught up in a pony-tail. The front girl and the cashier were each about sixteen or so. When I got in line, there were few other customers. One was a big teenaged boy, relatively attractive if you like the type, and the two McD's employees seemed to like that type.

While my joints occassionally ache and I can't stay up on no sleep the way I used to, I would never, ever go back to being a teenager. Primitive mating rituals... god preserve us. The cashier was attempting to sell him a "hand" - basically a post-it note that he could write his name on as a donation to charity. He would demure, then go back to the table and talk to his friends while the two girls behind the counter would whisper and giggle frantically. He'd come back, they'd push and shove each other until he got back up to the counter and then immediately start their bid again to sell him this "hand."

Finally, he bought one and wrote his name in big loopy letters. The two girls, frantic to read it before the other, accidentally ripped it in half. After some argument about whose fault this was, the two girls decided he could have another one, to fill out again. At this point, the manager, who was all of about two seconds older than the girls, decided to intervene. This was, he said solumnly, for charity, and they would just have to tape it up. Or, he offered, they could buy a second one.

More frantic giggling and pushing. Eventually, the boy - Mark, I saw by his loopy signature - bought a second "hand" but gave it to the cashier. She could, he said, put her name on it. The front-girl at this point, gave up the battle and started taping the old hand together to stick on the wall. She then busied herself with her actual job while the cashier wrote her own name out (Janice) and stuck it on the wall - next to Mark's.

After Mark finally went away (why, yes, I'm still waiting for my cheeseburger and fries) the front girl spent the next two or three minutes sweeping the floor, and not coincidentally, knocking Janice's "hand" off the wall.